If you smoke after sex, you’re doing it too fast!

You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.

To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.

Beer- It’s not just for breakfast anymore.

Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much.  Then again, don’t drink too little.  ~Herman “Jackrabbit” Smith-Johannsen

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk.  That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.  ~Ernest Hemingway

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.  ~Author Unknown

I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.  ~John Marcellus Huston

If you must drink and drive, drink Pepsi.  ~(Seen on a bumper sticker)

1) When being sad- It naturally happens with all people around the world. The reason for being sad can differ. In some situations, people cannot avoid being depressed like unemployment or beloved’s death etc. One of the celebrity’s sayings states that sadness will create wastage of people’s time.

2) When being happy- This is quite natural for all humans. Happiness can occur through any incident like dancing, laughing, chatting with group of friends etc. It can be said as a conscious choice but does not have response automatically.

3) While in Love mood- This is again a common mood/ interest with all humans. In fact, it is one of the best feelings that can be expressed deeply. Not only humans but also animals. Various interesting sayings quotes can be found in the internet.

Article by Myke Castaneda

A witty quote given on a perfect occasion can turn the worse of situation into a bearable one. Great wisdom is always conveyed even in a simple quotation. Whether it is a famous quote or saying or a historical quote, one written by a famous person or with an author unknown, a quote can really stimulate the mind.

Words are indeed powerful. It speaks to you in certain way that touches the heart and strums an emotional chord within you. Quotes are good to collect and keeping a list of your favorite famous, funny and witty quotes, you can be sure to be able to share a piece of wisdom for just about any occasion.

Here are some of my treasured collections of famous quotes. I have compiled them for years and read them from time to time. It serves as a wonderful counselor when you’re in doubt, gloomy or in need of some guidance.

Famous quotes“We must become the change we want to see.” – Mahatma Gandhi”All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing” – Edmund Burke”It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” – Albert Einstein”When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

Famous Quotes by Scientists“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison”Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.” – Thomas Edison”The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources” – Albert Einstein”Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.” – Albert Einstein

Quotes by Famous People“It is better to risk saving a guilty man than to condemn an innocent one.” – Voltaire”If you want to see the true measure of a man, watch how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.” – J. K. Rowling Quotes”Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.” – Muhammed Ali

Quotes from Historical Figures“Impossible is a word to be found only in the dictionary of fools.” – Napoleon Bonaparte”The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity.” Winston Churchill”A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.” – Harry Truman”I not only use all the brains that I have, but all that I can borrow.” – Woodrow Wilson

Quotes for Women and Quotes from Famous Women“How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.” – Anonymous”Some men spend a lifetime in an attempt to comprehend the complexities of women. Others pre-occupy themselves with somewhat simpler tasks, such as understanding the theory of relativity!” – Albert Einstein Quotes

Famous Funny Quotes“I was born intelligent but education ruined me.” – Anonymous”Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear to be bright until you hear them speak.” – Brian Williams”Every man should marry – after all, happiness is not the only thing in life.” – Anonymous”Your future depends on your dreams. So go to sleep.” – Anonymous”Smile — it makes people wonder what you’re up to.” – Anonymous”A man who surrenders when he’s wrong, is honest. A man who surrenders when he’s not sure is wise. A man who surrenders even if he’s right, is a husband.” – Author Unknown

Famous Philosopher Quotes“I am the wisest man alive, for I know one thing, and that is I know nothing.” – Socrates Quotes”All the gold which is under or upon the earth is not enough to give in exchange for virtue.” – Plato Quotes”A friend to all is a friend to none.” – Aristotle Quotes

More Great Quotes“The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him.” – Stanislaw Jerszy Lec”The person who has no opinion will seldom be wrong.” – Unknown”A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking” – Unknown

Read the rest of this collection at Carpe Diem | Make Your Life ExtraordinaryYou can also find Equotes a great resource for famous quotes and sayings and famous quotes from prominent figures.

A marriage is no amusement but a solemn act, and generally a sad one.
Queen Victoria

An ugly baby is a very nasty object – and the prettiest is frightful.
Queen Victoria

Being married gives one one’s position like nothing else can.
Queen Victoria

Being pregnant is an occupational hazard of being a wife.
Queen Victoria

Everybody grows but me.
Queen Victoria

The wheel of change moves on, and those who were down go up and those who were up go down.  ~Jawaharlal Nehru

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.  ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

Those who expect moments of change to be comfortable and free of conflict have not learned their history.  ~Joan Wallach Scott

Oh, would that my mind could let fall its dead ideas, as the tree does its withered leaves!  ~Andre Gide

If you want to make enemies, try to change something.  ~Woodrow Wilson

Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.  ~Pauline R. Kezer

If you would attain to what you are not yet, you must always be displeased by what you are.  For where you are pleased with yourself there you have remained.  Keep adding, keep walking, keep advancing.  ~Saint Augustine

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it.  ~John Steinbeck, America and Americans

A good question is never answered.  It is not a bolt to be tightened into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the hope of greening the landscape of idea.  ~John Ciardi

“I like my whisky old and my women young.”
Errol Flynn

“My Mama always said, ‘Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re gonna get.”

There are people who laugh to show their fine teeth, and there are those who cry to show their good hearts.

Joseph Roux

“A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car, but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.”

Theodore Roosevelt